I try. I try. This is my new life, illustrated in just a 2-hour period… Decide to go grocery shopping early this morning when they are open only for us senior citizens. Good.
My wife helps me prepare for my venture outside like my mother used to when I was a kid, making sure I put on my mask and gloves the proper way. Good.
Go in into store. No wipes by the carts. Person there said there are no wipes and assures me that all the carts have been sanitized. OH kay. As I shop, I see that I’m in the minority of those wearing masks. Not good.
Take my cart to check-out and find the cashier is not wearing gloves. I tell the manager. She said they are not required to wear gloves. OH kay.
Take my gloves off after I load the car and throw them away. Good.
Take my mask off when I pull into the driveway. Wrong.
My wife said I should not have left it on the car floor. Put all the groceries on a rug in the cold garage to be left there for 4 hours. Partly wrong.
My wife told me to bring all the frozen food in immediately and put on the kitchen floor where she wiped every item down before she put them in the freezer. I wash my hands with warm water and soap. Good. Safe, right?
Wifey happy, right? Well… my cell phone rings and when I went in my pocket to get it, she shrieked. “You just touched that dirty phone that was on you all morning?!”
I try. I try. Good luck, my friends.
Name withheld
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